A question for the fellas...

I've been meaning to make this post for about a week now. The stuff's a lil diluted because i've waited so long to do it, i've lost some of my steam...Ok fellas, what do y'all want??? I mean, I just came back from Drewzee 23's blog and a while back he posted a rant about black women and they (sic) attitudes. But this is what i'm saying, i've been told my whole life that i'm just sugar walking, that i'm sooooo nice. Now I know i'm starting in the negative to some guys because i'm a big girl, but besides that, i'd like to think i'm the sh&*! I've been working since I was 15, house, car, no kids, pretty girl, go to church, easygoing, engaging conversation, skills in bed (not to soud prideful but for real...) nice, you hear me, i'm a nice girl, but depending on who you talk to that may be working against me and speaking of (WTF is that all about anyway, being too nice???) men complain about black women being agressive, abrasive, bitchy, bitter, scorn. Don't get me wrong i've been in serious long-term relationships, but I ain't married yet. Everyday one of ya'll come up to me and ask why I ain't married, ya'll surprised somebody ain't (sic) wifed me yet. Bullshiggety...I'm a lil picky but hell, i've lowered my standards considerably since the recession, I know someyall' laid off, so i've laxed a bit but geez. The guy i'm seeing now told me that he liked things the way they are...which is homey/lover/friend but, I can't do it, the whole milk/cow thing. To take a quote from a comedian, "you hit this twice and we go together" it's either that or good wholesome friends, i'm approaching 30...No sir ree...no can do.
I mean judging from the pool that's been interested in me lately, i'm in for one hell of time trying to find a good guy. Living with mama, 6 kids 5 baby momma's, no job, temp service thugs, got barriers to employment like no HS diploma/GED, felonies on their record, no car havin', ain't lookin for a wife, still married but legally separated, no checking account having, commitment-phobes...This is a lil harsh but it a rant nonetheless...Take all this with a grain of salt cause I don't take myself too seriously when it comes to this kinda thing (blogging) and I know a lot of good men aout there that are the opposite of what I described.
I tend to think most men are looking for the perfect woman physically, but can compromise on the rest but I can't play yall like that. But I must know what is it that you're looking for in a woman/wife?

damn damn damn

Wtf is that Prince????

Death of an icon

This is some bull...I haven't been able to post my historic post because of the internet policies at work so i'll concede for now but when I get my internet situation resolved then i'll then be able to post more personal things.
Anywho...
So in general and very un-political news...A judge has ruled that Bratz Dolls no longer be sold. I don't know why i'm taking this personally but, well...Maybe I do. It has something to do with the fact that Mattel, the makers of Barbie (c) have brought about the recent court decision. Barbie sales are slumping, the gradual death of an icon was likely ensuing, which partly has to do with Bratz Dolls being th new trend, that's what kids like these days, dolls with attitude that look more like them, big heads and all (lol, jk). Since i'm at work i'll keep it polite. Let me know what you think, this is an excerpt from the CNN article posted today.
The ruling, issued in federal court in Riverside, followed a jury's finding that Bratz designer Carter Bryant developed the concept for the dolls while working for Mattel.

"...The same jury later awarded Mattel $10 million for copyright infringement and $90 million for breach of contract after a lengthy trial stemming from Mattel's 2004 lawsuit ended in August.

Mattel has fought to neutralize the Bratz line for years. The dolls -- with their huge lips, pug noses, almond-shaped eyes and coquettish figures -- were an instant hit with young girls. MGA had taken Bryant's original four dolls and spun out a line of more than 40 characters, complete with accessories and related toys such as Bratz Boyz, Bratz Petz and Baby Bratz.

El Segundo-based Mattel has seen sales of Barbie -- once a rite of passage for American girls -- slide since the doe-eyed Bratz dolls first came on the scene. Domestic sales of Barbie were down 15% in 2007.

Both sides had a lot riding on the judge's decision and had worried about the impact of any ruling during the holiday shopping season.

The judge's injunction named all 40 dolls in the Bratz line, including the four originals -- Yasmine, Chloe, Sasha and Jade. Larson also ordered MGA to reimburse its vendors and distributors for the cost of the dolls and all shipping charges for sending them back.

During trial, Mattel attorneys said MGA made nearly $778 million on the Bratz line since it was introduced seven years ago, and company Chief Executive Isaac Larian made $696 million through June -- but MGA insisted the profits were much less.

The post-trial dispute that prompted Wednesday's ruling centered on whether the jury found that only the first generation of four Bratz dolls infringed on Mattel's (MAT, Fortune 500) copyright or whether all the dolls in the line are in violation.

The jury verdict form only asked panelists to find whether there was infringement and assign a dollar reward, but did not ask them to specify which dolls among the dozens MGA made violated the law.

Los Angeles-based MGA, which no longer makes the first-generation dolls, argued that the later toys in the Bratz line don't violate the copyright and it could continue to sell them.

MGA attorney Raoul Kennedy argued that Larson had the discretion to determine which dolls violated Mattel's copyright. Mattel's attorneys disagreed, saying the court does not have the authority to interpret the jury's findings after the fact.

First Published: December 4, 2008: 6:50 AM ET

Katt Williams for Obama

A little comic relief from all the seriousness and stress regarding the upcoming election...(NSFW)

An old poem I found (well, 2)

From 2005.It's interesting to re-read my work, many things i've since forgotten.

Eager to embrace
The nothingness/fullness of
My failure/greatness
I exist unsteadily between them both
Waiting for one of them
To claim me as the author of my own defeat/victory
Ive existed in theory
and stood beside reality too long
Looking out as it looks in
There has been no hard work
To match my full intent
Far too many dreams and could haves
Have come in and out my mouth
Then my foot comes following after to
Stuff my hopeful mouth
To save the world from the
Bullshit that may follow the words
Or the words that may follow the bullshit
I can say these things because
they can change
But if they stay the same let me
Embrace failure for it has been chasing
Faster than I could run
Let it have me without a fight
Because if failure comes for me
I have not believed
I have not believed in the dreams I once called bullshit
Or have not followed the plans that I compulsively create
Or haven’t believed in God to answer my prayers
Then I have given up the faith that has held me all these years
Because the only true failure is in accepting it
Without a fight

And another...(I wrote last year on my birthday)

In 27 years I have learned
That all knowledge is contextual
Change is an action
And it is okay to
want what you want but
It is better to want you need
We are led by our desires
But we are often left by them
And while I have been desiring
The warm gentle touch of a
Loving hand
I have often found myself
Caressing the backs of my
Lovers with these hopeful hands
Because as folklore says
We often give to others
What we desire ourselves
And that for me is love.

A sobering moment for me...

Ok so I just went to a friend's blog and stumbled across this you tube clip of something that strikes a chord in me. I can't say that i'm surprised though. I'm surprised that people were so vocal with their bigotry but not by what they're saying. Now, I live in Ohio and these people look and sound just like the people I see everyday. Whether people wanna admit it or not, people are voting race this time around. Now I don't want to generalize, what I said was a bit over-reaching but but lets be real, some will vote for Barack to see a black man in office and others will vote for McCain becase they'll never vote for a black man in office. I know some people on both sides of the fence, but it does hurt a lil' to know that the country I live in is still divided by race. A few of my co-workers were Clinton supporters that refuse to vote for Obama, one cited that until he gets his ears pinned back that she isn't voting for him, and often refers to him as "Curious George" and I know then it has nothing to do with policies, platforms, partisanship, issues, party affiliation etc...I just smile and nod, I don't talk politics with whites, and I don't often wear my Obama buttons, and definitely don't do the bumper sticker thing because to me, it's personal and people are angry and I think it's not your political affiliation but who you're voting for that tags you and people automatically think if you vote for Obama while black means you're trying to help the movement to de-throne whites from the top of the proverbial race hierarchy in which they rule and we are the serfs. I know I take things a bit far but I just don't want any snide looks or any crazies keying my car because of who i'm supporting this time around. Anywho, i'm ranting, take a look for yourself.

My point exactly...

Is she really running for office as the second highest ranking official? I'm sorry but I think she is a joke. I'm embarassed for her.

Spell check anyone?

And they call us uneducated...

The bottle

So i'm on you-tube listening to some of Amiri Baraka's speeches and poems and I come across this gem, this work of art by another one of my faves, Gil Scott-Heron. This song, this video, it captures a moment in time, and expresses a reality that many of us know all too well. It lyrically puts me in the mind of Erykah Badu's "Bag Lady". The bottle he sings about is a metaphor and literal at the same time, it speaks to the bottle of alcohol, the baby bottle, and the confines of a metaphoric bottle that surrounds us I could write a whole speech about what this means to me. But I won't because less is more, and i'll just post it so you can interpret this as you will...

Choices

I've always been a fan of Nikki Giovanni. She has a simple yet profound way of writing. Profound is generous, but she has this uncanny ability to capture the whole of black womanhood in her work. I find myself in her words and that is something no writer has done for me. Giovanni's work is personal and I hold some of them near and dear to me. Two of the poems that belong in my personal restrospective narrative are "Introspection" and "Choices".

CHOICES

If i can't do
what i want to do
then my job is to not
do what i don't want
to do

It's not the same thing
but it's the best i can
do


If i can't have
what i want . . . then
my job is to want
what i've got
and be satisfied
that at least there
is something more to want


Since i can't go
where i need
to go . . . then i must . . . go
where the signs point
through always understanding
parallel movement
isn't lateral


When i can't express
what i really feel
i practice feeling
what i can express
and none of it is equal


I know
but that's why mankind
alone among the animals
learns to cry


-Nikki Giovanni

A better auntie

I love my nephew. I've gotta admit, I haven't been the best auntie...But this weekend, I missed him, I wanted to go pick him up and keep him for awhile. Going to get him would have made my sister happy because I don't take him places often. I want her to understand it has nothing to do with my nephew personally but not having children or a husband makes me a little selfish with my time and space. I'm alone most of the time, so much so that I have finally assimilated and grown comfortable living inside myself if that makes any sense. I'm on the go a lot, and I rarely stay at home, so getting my nephew means being at home or finding activities, the whole idea intimidates me a bit but I think i'm finally over it. I want for him to visit as much as possible, he's my only nephew and I Love him. I know this post makes me sound like a jerk but i'm new at this, so cut me a little slack, i'm getting better.

All Mavericky

I Love Tina Fey!!!!!!

Arch in his back

Ok so as much as I hate to put Tom Foolery on my page, I just had to...I'm speechless, uh. Yeah. If you can't stomach extreme gayness then don't even do it. Just skip on to the next post.

My debate quickie

On to the next debate...Biden did a good job representing his running mate. Palin did what I expected her to do, that is avoid answering questions, use populist messages and themes, call herself a Maverick (over and over), use her gender and having so many children as a tool to woo the Clinton supporters, mispronounce words (like nuclear), mistate the facts, don a cynical smirk, wink and nod etc...I just kept expecting her to say "daunt chaaa knaw". She has this glossy eyed, overly simplistic, naive, childishly competetive nature that is quite annoying. Biden conducted himself like a true politician should, being direct, knowing the issues, stating what he knows, standing up to the obviously bulleted list of comebacks that Palin tried to throw at him. I guarantee he didn't go to debate boot camp. I'm just saying...It was a good debate, but i'm looking forward to hear Obama at the next debate, after all, I'm voting the top of the ticket. Obama shake em' off.

blackwoman

will define herself. naturally. will
talk/walk/live/&love her images. her
beauty will be. the only way to be is
to be. blackman take her. u don't need
music to move; yr/movement toward her
is music. & she'll do more than dance.
-Haki Madhubuti

Rich Republicans

The McCain's are ballin'. We all know about their seven properties, about Cindy's Anhauser Busch fortune and their other riches. But I think it was a rather bold move for Cindy to walk into the RNC bling blingin' looking like something fresh off of a Vogue mag. Her outfit was estimated to cost around $313,000. Here in Ohio, you could buy three decent sized houses for that.While the GOP spent all night trying to paint Barack Obama as an elitist, Cindy McCain's outfit cost more than the combined income of Michelle and Barack Obama in 2004. In fact it would take 10 years of saving for the average American to afford her outfit. Look, here's my issue...I work in the welfare office so I see the America that has been directly affected by government overspending, job loss, foreclosures etc... I have to look into the eyes of people who have worked their whole lives and are now applying for public assistance with tears welling in their shameful eyes. Our number of intakes have almost tripled in recent months and people are angry, tired, struggling, underemployed, and wanting more than anything to work. People who have taken pay cuts from $25 hr to $9 per hour and have families, or raising children alone. So when I look into the audience of the RNC and see all the cowboy hat wearing, NRA card carrying, out of touch WASPs in the audience, I don't see me. I don't see the people I have to serve everyday as a civil servant. I see people wanting to protect their money, control of the better schools, to keep the gap between the upper and middle class wide. I see right wing conservatives that don't understand the culture of poverty and the changing face of America, the failures of our American school system, the depletion of federal resources, and the loss of a sense of community. This does not work for me, not because I want to vote for a Black man (if so I would've voted for Sharpton), not because I'm black and i'm supposed to vote democrat, not even because I work so closely with the poor and disenfranchised but because I understand the issues and I am hearing a call for change that needs to be answered, that can't be answered by someone who wants to serve as a continuation of all the policies of the current administration. And although i'm a woman, I can't identify with a gun toting, moose hunting, corrupt, sacrilegious, hypocritical, self-proclaimed pit-bull with lipstick from Alaska. I don't expect for the earth to move and the world to change when and if Barack wins the presidency but I do believe that he will not tread on the same path as Bush, and he will make some changes that will be the beginnning to help maintain our status as a world super-power.

Cindy McCain
Oscar de la Renta dress: $3,000
Chanel J12 White Ceramic Watch: $4,500
Three-carat diamond earrings: $280,000
Four-strand pearl necklace: $11,000–$25,000
Shoes, designer unknown: $600
Total: Between $299,100 and $313,100

Wow! No wonder McCain has so many houses: his wife has the price of a Scottsdale split-level hanging from her ears.

Check the facts! My last political rant! (maybe)

Ok so lets separate fact from fiction on the speeches at the RNC made by Palin and others.
I know this is long so please bear with me.
By JIM KUHNHENN, Associated Press Writer
Wed Sep 3, 11:48 PM ET

ST. PAUL, Minn. - Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and her Republican supporters held back little Wednesday as they issued dismissive attacks on Barack Obama and flattering praise on her credentials to be vice president. In some cases, the reproach and the praise stretched the truth.

Some examples:

PALIN: "I have protected the taxpayers by vetoing wasteful spending ... and championed reform to end the abuses of earmark spending by Congress. I told the Congress 'thanks but no thanks' for that Bridge to Nowhere."

THE FACTS: As mayor of Wasilla, Palin hired a lobbyist and traveled to Washington annually to support earmarks for the town totaling $27 million. In her two years as governor, Alaska has requested nearly $750 million in special federal spending, by far the largest per-capita request in the nation. While Palin notes she rejected plans to build a $398 million bridge from Ketchikan to an island with 50 residents and an airport, that opposition came only after the plan was ridiculed nationally as a "bridge to nowhere."

PALIN: "There is much to like and admire about our opponent. But listening to him speak, it's easy to forget that this is a man who has authored two memoirs but not a single major law or reform — not even in the state senate."

THE FACTS: Compared to McCain and his two decades in the Senate, Obama does have a more meager record. But he has worked with Republicans to pass legislation that expanded efforts to intercept illegal shipments of weapons of mass destruction and to help destroy conventional weapons stockpiles. The legislation became law last year. To demean that accomplishment would be to also demean the work of Republican Sen. Richard Lugar of Indiana, a respected foreign policy voice in the Senate. In Illinois, he was the leader on two big, contentious measures in Illinois: studying racial profiling by police and requiring recordings of interrogations in potential death penalty cases. He also successfully co-sponsored major ethics reform legislation.

PALIN: "The Democratic nominee for president supports plans to raise income taxes, raise payroll taxes, raise investment income taxes, raise the death tax, raise business taxes, and increase the tax burden on the American people by hundreds of billions of dollars."

THE FACTS: The Tax Policy Center, a think tank run jointly by the Brookings Institution and the Urban Institute, concluded that Obama's plan would increase after-tax income for middle-income taxpayers by about 5 percent by 2012, or nearly $2,200 annually. McCain's plan, which cuts taxes across all income levels, would raise after tax-income for middle-income taxpayers by 3 percent, the center concluded.

Obama would provide $80 billion in tax breaks, mainly for poor workers and the elderly, including tripling the Earned Income Tax Credit for minimum-wage workers and higher credits for larger families.

He also would raise income taxes, capital gains and dividend taxes on the wealthiest. He would raise payroll taxes on taxpayers with incomes above $250,000, and he would raise corporate taxes. Small businesses that make more than $250,000 a year would see taxes rise.

MCCAIN: "She's been governor of our largest state, in charge of 20 percent of America's energy supply ... She's responsible for 20 percent of the nation's energy supply. I'm entertained by the comparison and I hope we can keep making that comparison that running a political campaign is somehow comparable to being the executive of the largest state in America," he said in an interview with ABC News' Charles Gibson.

THE FACTS: McCain's phrasing exaggerates both claims. Palin is governor of a state that ranks second nationally in crude oil production, but she's no more "responsible" for that resource than President Bush was when he was governor of Texas, another oil-producing state. In fact, her primary power is the ability to tax oil, which she did in concert with the Alaska Legislature. And where Alaska is the largest state in America, McCain could as easily have called it the 47th largest state — by population.

MCCAIN: "She's the commander of the Alaska National Guard. ... She has been in charge, and she has had national security as one of her primary responsibilities," he said on ABC.

THE FACTS: While governors are in charge of their state guard units, that authority ends whenever those units are called to actual military service. When guard units are deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan, for example, they assume those duties under "federal status," which means they report to the Defense Department, not their governors. Alaska's national guard units have a total of about 4,200 personnel, among the smallest of state guard organizations.

FORMER ARKANSAS GOV. MIKE HUCKABEE: Palin "got more votes running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska than Joe Biden got running for president of the United States."

THE FACTS: A whopper. Palin got 616 votes in the 1996 mayor's election, and got 909 in her 1999 re-election race, for a total of 1,525. Biden dropped out of the race after the Iowa caucuses, but he still got 76,165 votes in 23 states and the District of Columbia where he was on the ballot during the 2008 presidential primaries.

FORMER MASSACHUSETTS GOV. MITT ROMNEY: "We need change, all right — change from a liberal Washington to a conservative Washington! We have a prescription for every American who wants change in Washington — throw out the big-government liberals, and elect John McCain and Sarah Palin."

THE FACTS: A Back-to-the-Future moment. George W. Bush, a conservative Republican, has been president for nearly eight years. And until last year, Republicans controlled Congress. Only since January 2007 have Democrats have been in charge of the House and Senate

Church and State

Although I missed it, Palin's speech last night apparantly woo'd the likes of the media and accomplished her goal to fight back both aggressively and with cynicism. Since I haven't heard the speech, i'll probably you-tube it later. I see that the republicans are going at it hard this time around with shock factor and using any tactics necessary to win, but we'll see how that goes. That's politics as usual I guess. But what this media circus is doing is effectively taking the focus off McCain for right now to give him time to prepare for the next two months, he's letting Palin jab at Barack and saving his energy and focus for the debates. Oh, and speaking of Obama, he'll be on The O'Reilly factor today, so you'll have to choose between that and the last day of the RNC. I'll reserve my opinion about the racist and sexist shock jock that is Bill O'Reilly, but I just don't know that it was a smart idea for Barack to appear on such a show where the Host and audience will be all republican. Barack's a fighter and he's tough, so he'll be fine i'm sure, I can't wait to see it. So in closing i'll leave you with the latest on Palin, an article about her saying, things like, "the Iraq war is a Task from God". Now i'm a churchgoing kinda chick but i'll beg to differ...It was a task from Bush, and i'd appreciate it if she'd keep church and state separate., I like the end of the article when Rob Boston says "I miss the days when pastors delivered sermons and politicians delivered political speeches" Simple yet profound.

By GENE JOHNSON, Associated Press Writer
Wed Sep 3, 7:23 PM ET


ANCHORAGE, Alaska - Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin told ministry students at her former church that the United States sent troops to fight in the Iraq war on a "task that is from God."

ADVERTISEMENT

In an address last June, the Republican vice presidential candidate also urged ministry students to pray for a plan to build a $30 billion natural gas pipeline in the state, calling it "God's will."

Palin asked the students to pray for the troops in Iraq, and noted that her eldest son, Track, was expected to be deployed there.

"Our national leaders are sending them out on a task that is from God," she said. "That's what we have to make sure that we're praying for, that there is a plan and that plan is God's plan."

A video of the speech was posted at the Wasilla Assembly of God's Web site before finding its way on to other sites on the Internet.

Palin told graduating students of the church's School of Ministry, "What I need to do is strike a deal with you guys." As they preached the love of Jesus throughout Alaska, she said, she'd work to implement God's will from the governor's office, including creating jobs by building a pipeline to bring North Slope natural gas to North American markets.

"God's will has to be done in unifying people and companies to get that gas line built, so pray for that," she said.

"I can do my job there in developing our natural resources and doing things like getting the roads paved and making sure our troopers have their cop cars and their uniforms and their guns, and making sure our public schools are funded," she added. "But really all of that stuff doesn't do any good if the people of Alaska's heart isn't right with God."

Palin attended the evangelical church from the time she was a teenager until 2002, the church said in a statement posted on its Web site. She has continued to attend special conferences and meetings there. Religious conservatives have welcomed her selection as John McCain's running mate.

Rob Boston, a spokesman for Americans United for Separation of Church and State, lamented Palin's comments.

"I miss the days when pastors delivered sermons and politicians delivered political speeches," he said. "The United States is increasingly diverse religiously. The job of a president is to unify all those different people and bring them together around policy goals, not to act as a kind of national pastor and bring people to God."

The section of the church's Web site where videos of past sermons were posted was shut down Wednesday, and a message was posted saying that the site "was never intended to handle the traffic it has received in the last few days."

Random post

I just wanted to say that i wanna look like Beyonce when I grow up.

From 50 to a billion

Everytime I see 50 cent on the top of the richest black list (behind Oprah and a few others of course) I wanna hate. I get a lil salty because in my humble opinion, he is an asshole. But who am I to say? Most of my annoyance with him has to do with the arson allegations against him. I believe he had something to do with it and what's worse, his son was in the house when it was set ablaze. Besides all that he's rich. Most of the reason has to do with his deal with Vitamin Water/Coca Cola (when Coca Cola bought Glaceau for 4.1 billion), the 100 million dollar deal that is...Then the 150 million more he made this year. But to add insult to injury, he's prahlly gonna get richer and I don't know whether to hate on em' or congratulate him because he is making some major money moves. Check this out, according to a recent Forbes article:
Last May, 50 paid a visit to billionaire mining baron Patrice Motsepe in South Africa. Flanked by select members of their respective entourages, the unlikely duo descended into a subterranean trove of platinum, palladium and iridium, growing like moss on the earth's warm innards. A spectacular backdrop for a bling-drenched music video, to be sure.

But 50 was there for other business: to forge a joint venture with Motsepe that could soon bring him an equity stake in the mine--and 50 Cent-branded platinum to the world.

"Things that people wouldn't actually expect me to be involved in," 50 muses a few weeks later, reminiscing on his trip. "I've got a diverse portfolio."

Here, in the comfort of a midtown Manhattan office, just miles from the Queens, N.Y., streets where 50 once dealt cocaine, the glowering rapper whose lyrics are often punctuated with gunshots is nowhere to be found. In his place is Curtis Jackson, businessman. Less gangster, more Gordon Gekko, he ticks through the contents of his portfolio: stocks, bonds, real estate, investment pools, all carefully monitored by brokers at Goldman Sachs (nyse: GS - news - people ) and Morgan Stanley (nyse: MS - news - people ).

Over the past 12 months, 50 has added $150 million to his substantial coffers. He hawks clothing, sneakers, videogames, movies, ringtones and flavored water. His earnings were nearly twice as much as last year's hip-hop cash king, Shawn "Jay-Z" Carter, and over four times the sum garnered by Sean "Diddy" Combs, who ranked third for the second year in a row. After topping Forbes' inaugural Cash Kings list, the trio released a modified version of 50's "I Get Money" called "The Forbes 1-2-3 Remix."

My political rant for the day

So....Sarah Palin's 17 year old daughter is pregnant. Palin also has a newborn with Down Syndrome, she has five children altogether. She is a govenor of Alaska, where the population is less than most US cities. She has the thinnest experience in the history of anyone ever to run for VP. Palin is also a gun toting, card carrying member of the NRA. What makes her a good choice again? With all her family issues and a special-needs child why would she want to accept the position that would take her away from family at such a fragile time? I understand trying to get the Hillary vote but, if that is the only reason she was chosen, then she is a tool, a bad tool at that. Suppose something happens to McCain at 72 and having skin cancer (although in remission)then who is she to step into the White House to be the President? surely not a qualified, deserving candidate, it's almost a joke, a scary one at that. I hate to think that someone who is a democrat would cross party lines to vote because their candidate wasn't chosen as VP, do you vote the person or the party, sex or issues, race or agenda? We'll see how this all affects the economy and healthcare, and how long this war is stretched out (100 years anyone?). Well, let me stop while i'm ahead, the story about her daughter is below. Check out how many right wing conservatives and religious folk jump in to her defense. This whole thing is sick and sad. Y'all know who's got my vote.
ST. PAUL, Minn. - John McCain's running mate Sarah Palin said Monday that her 17-year-old unmarried daughter is five months pregnant, an announcement campaign aides said was aimed at rebutting Internet rumors that Palin's youngest son, born in April, was actually her daughter's.

A statement released by the campaign said that Bristol Palin will keep her baby and marry the child's father. Bristol Palin's baby is due in late December.

"Our beautiful daughter Bristol came to us with news that as parents we knew would make her grow up faster than we had ever planned. We're proud of Bristol's decision to have her baby and even prouder to become grandparents," Sarah and Todd Palin said in the brief statement.

Sarah Palin's fifth child, a son named Trig, was born in April with Down syndrome. Internet bloggers have been suggesting that the child was actually born to Bristol Palin but that her mother, the 44-year-old Alaska governor, claimed to be the mother.

"Senator McCain's view is this is a private family matter. As parents, (the Palins) love their daughter unconditionally and are going to support their daughter," said McCain spokesman Steve Schmidt.

"Life happens," he said.

"An American family," added Salter.

The advisers said Palin told them about the pregnancy during lengthy discussions about her background. At several points during the discussions, McCain's team warned Palin that the scrutiny into her private life would be intense and that there was nothing she could do to prepare for it.

Prominent religious conservatives, many of whom have been lukewarm toward McCain's candidacy, predicted that Palin's daughter's pregnancy would not diminish conservative Christian enthusiasm over the vice presidential hopeful.

"I think it's a very private matter," said Roberta Combs, president of the Christian Coalition of America. "It's a matter that should stay in the family and they have to work through it together. My prayers go out to them."

Added Combs: "We're excited about the governor and think she's going to do well."

Mathew Staver, dean of Liberty University School of Law, said: "We're all sinners."

"We all make mistakes. Certainly, the ideal is not to get pregnant out of wedlock. But she made the right decision after her mistake," he said.

Staver also criticized anyone who would seek to make it a negative campaign issue: "It's absolutely shameful to put her child in the spotlight. She's not running for office. When someone can't face issues, they try to tear down a family."

____

Associated Press Writers Eric Gorski in St. Paul and Steve Quinn in Anchorage, Alaska, contributed to this report.

Foul mouthed lil' kid...

*SMH* (NSFW)
I know that's a lot of internet jargon, but this isn't safe for work...

I love weddings

Humming, "it's sooo good loving somebody, when somebody loves you back, and that's a fact!"
Congrats to the newlyweds! Tavon and Candy

Phew, nephew that is...

It's been two and a half years since my nephew was born and he's never spent the night with me, until tonight that is. I haven't really child-proofed my house yet but it's about 9:30pm and it's dark outside, I'll be taking him over my mom's before church (I ain't ready for that yet) so we'll see what adventures his visit will bring. I am working on being a better auntie. I've taken him places before and he's been over my house, just never slept here. I don't have any children yet so we'll see what this does to my perception of what it's like. Yeah, yeah, I know it's only overnight but this is a first for me. He's not potty-trained and he's quite rambunctious. I don't usually cut the TV on and it's usually pin-drop quiet in here. I have a few toys in the closet and if all else fails i've got crayons and notebooks with notes from Antioch and Sinclair. I want children, I really do. I'm not sure what God has in mind for me, i'm approaching 30 and my clock is ticking. If I don't have children naturally, i've been considering adopting, although there's a lot to ponder about that. I want a child that looks like me and that was made in love with someone special, someone who gives me their last name. Perhaps i'm taking this a bit far but hey, i'm just thinking and blogging, blogging and thinking. This is my train of thought, raw and un-edited. Don't take me to seriously. Well perhaps I should go, make sure all knives are away and make sure there's no dangerous chemicals easily accessible. So until next time. (Perhaps i'll have a story to tell)

Booty

Ok so, um...I don't really know what to say. This is uhhh, weird bruh...Kinda creepy. Don't go to prison, be on yo best behavior please...This is what they should show instead of scared straight.

What does it mean to be passive aggressive?

My name as far as this blog is concerned I am the queen of a land called passiveaggressiva...Hence my name underneath all of my posts and as the mediator of all things fly...I will say however that I never had a complete understanding of what it really means to be "PA". So as a student of pop culture and all things current I googled it to make sure I should preside over such a land. my findings were interesting, I fit the profile (kinda but not so much) it was more like a diagnosis, and honestly it's kinda sad. So I figured i'd share the wealth of knowledge, ahem: (there will be a part II to this)

The DSM IV describes this personality type as having passive resistance to demands for adequate performance in social and occupational settings (DSM IV p. 733). It has also been referred to as a negativistic type of personality that involves more than just a passive resistance to demands. Included in the behaviors are fault-finding, moodiness, vascillating behavior, temper outbursts, sulkiness, with alternation between hostile assertion of self-autonomy, to dependent repentance or contrition.

Passive aggressive types are characterized by their ambivalence about themselves and others. They have difficulty making decisions, are uncomfortable with having to make them, and often leave their decisions to fate or chance, rather than having to accept the finality of a decision.

In addition to their ambivalence, they also exhibit a self-centeredness in that they need to have as many options open as possible, in order to not feel restricted or controlled, no matter what effect this has on others. If ever pinned down to making a decision, in a romantic relationship for example, they may vaguely state what they believe their partner wants to hear, only to take it back gradually, in their actions. If they are confronted about this behavior, they may exhibit anger and act as if they have been attacked and victimized, rather than own up to their ambivalence. Their goal is to postpone decisions, with the hopes that something will happen to decide for them. However, if the decision is made for them, they often backtrack to try to undo the finality of that decision.

According to some theorists (Pretzer & Beck, 1996), persons with this personality view themselves as being self-sufficient but feel vulnerable to control and interferance from others. They believe they are misunderstood by others, a view that is exacerbated by the negative responses they receive from others for their vascillations.

A primary conflict for passive aggressive types, is dependency. They fear the power of those on whom they are dependent, even if those they depend on never exert power or are not aware of the conflict. Rather than work on their own problems with this dependency, they vascillate between submissiveness and deliberate rebelliousness. Their relationships suffer because partners, friends, and/or family members cannot decipher or understand their evasiveness as attempts at independence. Often the passive aggressive person is not entirely conscious of his/her behavior.

Sometimes the passive aggressive person (PA for brevity) is acting against internal pressure rather than real expectations from others. The PA imagines everyone in his/her life to be making unreasonable demands. Often the PA is correctly perceiving that significant others have expectations of them, which triggers the dependency vs self-sufficient conflict, to which they act out accordingly. With so much internal conflict and energy spent on battling with the feelings that are generated (feelings of imprisonment real or imagined, feelings of limitations from making decisions, feelings of entitlement, etc.), there is little energy left to look at the self.

The underlying conficts typically are rooted in childhood, where one or both parents did not allow the child to win any battles of self-assertion or power. The child only had the option of asserting him/herself via passive, hidden tactics. Since children "know" on some level, that they are dependent on their parents, openly asserting themselves when their parents have worked against this, would not be an option.

On a preconscious level the child, who is too intellectually immature to question his/her parents, would pick up on behavioral ques, even if the communication from the parents was not overt. The impressions or conditioning the child would receive regarding assertion, aggression, individuation, would mold the child into picking other options for self-assertion. Since all living beings need to assert themselves, inhibiting that to a great extent assures alternate routes of expression to be found, whether they are adaptive or not. Displacement of this anxiety or conflict, onto present-day relationships of the adult PA, keeps the PA involved in the struggle with individuation, that could be resolved if the original conflict were addressed.

Being PA does not mean one is not as aggressive as openly aggressive types. It means that the aggression is hidden, not open, but still expressed. PAs can be even more aggressive while preserving their own belief in their passive nature. The aim of the behavior is to aggress while hiding and appearing passive.

Some theorists have considered that the PA may have been constitutionally more aggressive or sensitive as a baby. A parent might naturally try to curb aggressiveness in a toddler without considering future behavioral consequences.

Passive aggressive behavior has been confused with narcissistic behaivor since the PA behaviors can have a narcissistic self-serving quality. However, PA behaviors exist in different personality types and not exclusively in narcissistic types

I need a tip drill? Get over it already!

I should be a better blogger, really I should...I'm on the computer a lot, everyday in fact and I have so many things I want to talk about, so many things on my mind and I tend to look at my blog and then find something else to do.
Today I had a conversation with a friend about a video clip I saw yesterday of Nelly being intervied by a radio personality who mentions the dreaded "Tip Drill" video. I just kept thinking to myself, how many times and ways can people make Nelly pay for that video? Do I think it was mysogynistic? yes. Is he more responsible than other artists both black and white, BET videos, Paris Hilton, the modeling industry in whole? No. Do I think that all that he donates to charity should be overshadowed by something that was recorded years ago? No. I just think that the media likes to harpoon black celebs on their downfalls and in turn exploits them at their worst moments and will not let them move beyond controversy. Well just in case you'd like to know what i'm talking bout...This chick is killin' me...

A virgin at the auction

So yesterday I decided to go to my first auction. And as always there is a story. So my co-worker and I decide to go to a luxury home auction also the contents of a cleaning business. There were no minimums required. So when we arrive, I notice that luxury was an understatement, the homes in the gated community started at about 700,000. I didn't even feel like I was in Dayton...The family was downsizing. They auctioned off everything from furniture to books to grills to pianos to an air hockey table and more...Upon arrival, I notice a small mob gathering around a table, there was mostly junk on it and the auctioneer started the prices at around $5 per box and eventually auctioned all the tiems on the table for around about $12.50. There was every business book and manual known to man, childrens movies, and pots and pans. Now I just wanted to see what it was like so I only had $10 at the time. I really wanted some of that stuff, but here's the interesting part of the day.
Some of the people hoarded their wares off to the side after they won their bids. Afterwards people were willing to sell some of their items. So a co-worker and I looked over at a bucket of umbrellas, really really good expensive umbrellas, that she told me were auctioned off at about $25 for the entire bucket. So this white guy, nicely dressed, a businessman obviously, came peering over asking if we were interested in anything from his pile, and so we looked. Some things interesting, some not. But I say a really fancy umbrella, and I offered him $5 for it, after all he'd gotten a bucket of about 12 high quality umbrellas for %25, he looked at me absurdly almost insulted, he said "Do you know these retail for over $35 each?" I replied, "but you bought these used for the price of one" so he asked me to go higher, and I said forget it. So I see a stock pot, i've been needing on of these lately, and I offered him a dollar then 2, to get the same type of look and he said $5 and I said ok. My co-worker an auction guru, kept fanning and waving for me not to buy it but I did, she later told me that at estate auctions you can get better pots, whole boxes of them for like $1. So i'm dumbfounded, wanting my money back after all I only had $10. So I attempt to get my money back and this guy looked and me very sternly and abrubtly saying "but you already bought it, thank you though".
I decided I was done. I had to re-think going into business. I'll explore more later. My break is over.
To be continued....

Today is...

Ok so it's here...My b-day
I've been here 28 years still trying to figure out what to do next.
It's not a big deal anymore I guess...
I'm having an all out paaaaaarrrrttttaaay on my 30th birthday though!!!

This always makes me smile...

I remember when this first aired. I had to be Rudy's age. This is a classic, i'mma make my kids watch this.

Refreshing music (pt II)

Ok so here's the song of the month. Last month I posted something on Karina Pasian, this time it's Jazmine Sullivan, this song almost brought tears to my eyes. It wasn't really the song, more her voice. It's soulful and fresh, people compare her to Lauryn Hill but she has a sound all her own and the song is good, the video is nice, be on the lookout. Can't wait till the CD comes out. Check out the video, I promise you won't be disappointed!


Now, this is a throwback, she was on Apollo at the age of 11. Her voice was rich then, where'd she get all that soul, I got the chills about 5 times while she was singing "Accept what God Allows"

I know 'yall remember Showbiz

Before Chuck E Cheese...We'll they're back at it. This is so damn funny!

This week, better, much better...

So i'm in a better mood. I think I should probably delete the last post, one might mistakenly slip some Zoloft in my tea if I continue on that way. So it's been an interesting week, from Ol' Jesse poisoning the proverbal well of our first beakon of light in years, Obama to The Williams sisters (Venus nem')not getting much press after their victories at Wimbledon to the rumors that E badu is pregnant with Jay Electronica's baby (yes yes ya'll that would make three rapper babydaddies) I could go on and on...I've been visiting my fave blogs recently and have been thoroughly entertained this week. My favorite is www.crunktastical.net Fresh is the best hands down. Then I make my rounds to Bossip, and then I go to another excellent blog, www.pioneerwoman.com, and of course CNN.com which isnt' a blog at all but that's how I get my daily dose of news, I'd never on purpose watch Fox news. I read that they often make a mockery of Obama's blackness and appealing to the fears and stereotypes of many people pertaining to race and religion. First there was the Obama/Osama slip-up then there was the "Michelle, Obama's baby mama" and then calling fist bump something related to being a terrorist tactic. smh @ them. They sould be so 'shamed.
Anywho, I reckon I should go (reckon is a new/old word i've been using lately) and do some work, but have a wonderful weekend. I'm sure i'll be blogging again soon. I'm back at it yall!!!

The Fourth

I woke up this morning in a contemplative mood. A tad bitter.
Lately I have been moody, riding my usual wave of emotions. So, yesterday was the Fourth of July, the day irritated me a bit. I was reluctant to get dressed and go over my mom's to help her barbeque. I just wasn't feeling the whole thing. Let me explain, a lot of holidays become so consumer driven that the meaning is lost and then all it becomes about is spending money to commemorate the day. I bet Jehovah's Witnesses have money to save since they don't spend money on holidays. For the Fourth of July, there's the food for the cookout, there's the buying of the fireworks, the red white and blue clothing or your "outfit for the fourth", hair and nails for the ladies, the festive decor and whatever else your traditions are related to Independence Day. Not only that, I have been hearing m80's explode for a week now, and for some reason, many kids tend to save a stash of fireworks for the week following the fourth. Last night there was a deep fog that engulfed the city, that combined with a zillion people about there lighting their pirotechnics and the big shows the city plans every year, my night felt surreal and extra smokey. Since people like to get drunk on the Fourth, there were checkpoints everywhere, and although I am legit, I had to try to find an alternate route because I have an unpaid surveillance speeding ticket that remains unpaid. I needed gas desperately, but all the gas stations were occupied by people stuntin' in their fourth of july outfits and D-boys with their over the top big wheels (profile cars), panhandlers, and women parading around in stillettos and short skirts. All I want is gas, and for whatever reason every gas station I pass on the West Side resembles a club parking lot. I cannot. So then, out of options, I pull up at "Club Shell" and wait at the pump for this $4.09 gas that seems to be going out of style...I finally arive home a few minutes later exhausted and perhaps a bit lonley. Maybe this holiday is a drab for me because last year the night of the Fourth was when my ex and I broke up. Maybe i'm taking it a bit far, but it didn't use to be this way. Maybe i'm hormonal, i'll stop while i'm ahead.

...and in with the new

'Nuff said...

Is this really the highest ranking official?

Well, he's on his way out!!! I know it sounds cheesy but "Yes we can"!!!!

Kiddie Prom?

I know it's been awhile and my blog has morphed into something kinda like a pop-culture blog, buy I just haven't had the time to post the kind of material that I once did. But I will soon, until then, I just wanted to post yet another example of for lack of a nicer term, "tom foolery". Who even makes weave, heels, and prom dresses in this size??? Here's a bit of advice, don't be sending your barely potty trained kids to prom it makes us look bad.

Everyone Nose

I have to admit, I am a Pharrell stan, better yet let me be honest, I heart N.E.R.D.
What's funny is that I have a huge music collection and i've never bought a Pharrell album nor a NERD album. I think Pharrell and chad Hugo Kill it everytime they lay a beat. There's something futuristic about it, and the horns, synthesizers, and heavy drum beats create what I like to call "eargasms". I even like their artists, everyone from The Cool Kids to Teyana Taylor. It makes me wanna be a part of this newer generation of kids who wear brightly colored clothes and skateboard. Pharrell's a producer that can rap, that is to be applauded because I heard a rap by Puffy that was far less than stellar, it made me sad in fact. So the reason i'm posting all this is because I just recently heard "Everyone Nose", not to mention the kickass remix, and I can't help but to jig to it. I even had to reason with mysely as to if I could really jig to a song about women using Cocaine in the bathroom at the club (everyone knows). I don't care, it's funky anyway. Btw just in case you wanna know, Chad Hugo could get it. In short, i've gotta buy this new album. I may even go back and get the throwbacks.

Frontin

When you front, this is what you look like. -Absurd

Breath of fresh air...

So i've been wanting to find some good music, and i've been checking the blogs and random playlists for something that makes me move. This song by Karina Pasian moved me but in a different way, I have hope for the next generation, however corny that sounds, but it was really refreshing to hear a youg woman sing a song like this and make it sound good too...It's called "Sixteen at War"

Not from the Ace! These are amazing....

CAKES!!! How did they make icing and fondant do that? on the last cake there even appears to be outdoor neon tubing on the cake...These cakes are by Zhanna, believe it or not there's even more amazing cakes...

Bad Luck BBQ

So I told myself I would blog about my latest adventure, good ol' fashioned barbeque. So I decided that since the weather has been wonderful lately, then I should do something outdoors, something american, something not too labor intensive, something new. Now, i'm starting to learn to cook but grilling is a new arena for me. I excitedly hurried to the nearest Family Dollar to buy my wares. I bought the traditional tools, charcoal, lighter fluid, a spray bottle, and aluminum foil. I had everything planned out, i'd boil the chicken first in a special brine, and then i'd grill some pre-tenderized steak, then make some mac n' cheese and those new "grillin beans". Before I stray too far, the I must tell you that my grill isn't some huge to do, it is a very modest, small, and janky grill I bought from Wal-mart for a frugal $19 and the time it was a pretty big deal. It had been on my cousin's back porch for must about all fall and winter, so I expected a bit of wear and tear but this thing once shiny red was now a dull, faded pink and the charcoal that was still in the pit was stuck. Now I don't mind domestic work but I'm not a get down and dirty kinda gal, so I look for the closest set of gloves. The gloves were actually the yellow dishwashing gloves, a little ghetto I know. I dumped the ash but only half fell, so I had to dig the remains out the bottom with my glove protected hands. I'm trying my hardest to make this a short story but that's not how this is working out so please bear with me. One thing I forgot was a grill brush, and I wasn't cleaning this grill in my house. So I decided to take the lazy way out and line the top rack with aluminum foil, um wrong answer and i'll tell you why in a few. Next I light the coals, it is very likely that I over-did the lighter fluid thing. It is likely that I did something wrong with the fire, I could tell that something wouldn't be done in the middle (thank goodness I boled the chicken first)So finally, I placed the meat on the grill and closed the lid. I waited a few minutes and realized that I didn't poke holes in the foil so then I did. Well did I mention that I went shopping at Family Dollar, and while they do have name brands, I opted for the generic .69 kind, it was of the cheap persuasion so what was supposed to be small poke holes, turned into savagely huge tear marks. So if you're keeping up, the coals aren't hot, the holes are too big in the foil and my meat isn't really cooking so I decided to re-light the fire. Now the trick was to do it without any fatalities. Hmmm, this would prove harder than it sounds. I'll spare you the details but needless to say I made it. After a few sprays, by brand new spray bottle died. Frustrated, I took the meat off the grill, and made a back up dinner, skyline chili spaghetti. So in short, I won't be grilling again any time soon it sucks, maybe I just suck. It's over, i'm done, I'm officially a bake boil or fry kind of girl. Please, don't laugh at the pics. btw, the meat turned out really flavorful but my grandma said her chicken wasn't done and that eating blood of an animal works against her body so she couldn't partake. Hmm, my piece seemed fine but that sorry excuse for a steak was pretty bad, it was pretenderized but managed to be tough, ford tough. Uh, if you barbeque, can I come over? I ain't got it!

Urban

I've got a lot of favorite artists. Thomas Green, Kadir Nelson, Paul Goodnight, but now adding to that collection of non abstract contemprary artists is David M. Lenz, this is from his "Urban" series. It takes an extrodinary talent to be able to paint such works of art. At first glance, this looks like a photograph, well at second and third glance too...Check him out, www.davidmlenz.com

The End is Near

For the fellas...

How about a these cufflinks...At first glance, boring...then you notice these aren't just any cufflinks, they're actually USB's, now that's combining fashion with function.

In the future...

I hope we're not concerned with who has the flyest Gas Mask. Designer Diddo Velema produced some high fashion gas masks. It's almost laughable, kinda like when I saw designer SARS masks in China, bafoonery I say...I'm gon' get me a designer water tank in the last days...One day you might walk into the hospital and see the nurses walking around in Prada scrubs with Karl Lagerfield goggles and Jimmy Choo croc's. Perhaps i'm taking it a bit far but I never thought i'd see the day when I saw a car with a Gucci logo'd interior, one with a Louis Vuitton logo on the door and all this crazy stuff that people do to help themselves look like idiots. What did Kweli say? "...Like slaves on a ship talkin' bout' who got the flyest chains". On my way to work I stumbled across the Russ Parr show and they were talking about African Americans, and the question of the day was "Are you afraid to look poor?" The went on to read the statistics on consumer spending of African Americans and it says that we spend far more on Cars, Clothes, Electronics and Jewelry than education, investments, books, and savings. It's sad but true. I hate to make this a black issue, but I have to pull from my only point of reference. People were on air denying it, while others chose to keep it real, but most people I know buy Coach purses even if it's fake, the same with sunglasses, if it says D&G people will buy it because it's all about perception. we want to look like we have something. I work in a welfare office where the recipients often look better than me. And Even though I think it's sad, I can admit that I have a spending problem, last year I pulled off the lot in a new SUV, but can barely afford to keep it on half a tank, I mean the thing only gets 17 MPG and it takes close to $100 to fill it up with the most recent spike in gas prices. I say all this to say, we've got to do better.

Small Space BIG Style

this is amazing, now in addition to being a foodie, i'm a teckie, and whatever you call someone who's into art and design, an artie maybe? I wish I had loftier goals, but hey...this is a sofa that transforms into bunk beds...When I get a degree, and move, and buy a new place, it's gonna be modern. I think this is so cool.
You can check out the article at www.notcot.org

Come on Solange...

I couldn't resist...
Are you feeling this look?

This is for you Jahzie...

So according to my best friend Lauryn Hill is the undisputed queen of all queens, so it's fun to bring funny thing to her attention like this... It's a re-make of Ex factor, with Syleena Johnson and RayJ which almost sounds as good as the original, that is...until RayJ starts rapping...Eat your heart out L-Boogie, what do you think?
Follow the link to Soulbounce, I don't know how to upload the player onto this page, as you can from the last post i'm not too great at this...
Copy this url into your browser:
http://www.soulbounce.com/soul/2008/04/syleena-johnson-does-lauryn-hill-again.php

Just in case you have any problems getting there it's on www.soulbounce.com

Gives me Chills...

">" border="0" alt="" />
This song takes me back to my "deep" days...This song makes me want something more...It makes me anxious, it makes me wanna go to a place where I can be in love, and can be me perfectly, a place where I have thing to do like go to musuems, paint, have dinner parties with friends, have a home studio, travel often, drive to NY to hang out, go to live concerts, write books, sip on double shots expresso while writing a poem on my macbook at a trendy Starbucks or Borders. This song makes me wanna live big and I don't know what does it for me, it could be Jill's voice, or the lovey dovey words...I don't know but since i'm not in the place that I wanna be right now, i'll just settle for watching this video with my eyes closed smiling imagining myself there snapping at the end of her performance...riding the night wind, taking photographs after the show, happy...

Super Sweet 16

As promised, these are the pics from the twin's big day, their 16th birthday. They had great fun with friends and fam. It was a day full of BBQ, tennis, bubbles, kids, dancing, and laughter. Hannah Montana the super mogul is the flippin Bill Gates of the Tween market I tell ya, she dominates the field. The twins had a HM dog tag, purse, cake and bracelets. When they go to sleep, the will sleep in their HM gowns and in the morning they will watch their HM "Make a Wish" DVD...crazy right? Well i've got things to do, until next time...

Happy Birthday Spring...Can't stand lame dudes...

So i'm back at home on the internet...I'm pretty excited about that, so I decided to make a post. It's not about anything drastically important or life altering. Just a reg'lar old post about things like today being the twins' birthday, the great spring weather, the fact that I should be going to church today...The twins turn sixteen, i'm getting old...They will be graduating High School soon, for their birthday I bought a outdoor game set, I think they'll like it. It's a beautiful day, mom's BBQ'ng. Yesterday was nice but today will be better, the sun's already shining. I'm happiest on days when the sun appears to brighten my days. I have so much to be thankful for, which is why I should be at church, I had a long night last night, went to O'Charley's, the pool hall, midnight bowling, and to the waffle house. I didn't come strolling in the house until about 4:00am and then decided to edit some pictures online for awhile before my sweet escape to sleep. Well anyway, i'll post pics of the twins' birthday later on...Oh and one more thing, my cousin's friend (with benefits) tried to set me up on a blind date with his cousin and I think it was the most strange hour that happened in awhile to me, I wanted to be somewhere else, or wish i could've somehow erased the fact that he was sitting next to me. The cousin's friend tells the guy to meet us at the Waffle House, my first impression was of him roughhousing one of his cousins, not in a play play kinda way either. Then he barely spoke, so things just went downhill from there, no formal introduction or anything. So when I sat down, he made some ridiculuous comment about me acting like I did't want to sit next to him, so he sat across from me. I was fine with that but I wasn't acting any particular way at the time. Even if I wasn't feeling the guy I would have still tried to be good company, come on'...So I say something or another to let him know he could join me in the booth, he obliges but reluctantly. His body language was horrible, he acted 15 but looked 4o, had no conversation, and spent most of the time asking me about my coffee. I understood that there was no chemistry, no attraction physical or otherwise early on, like when he got out of his banged up Surburban, but I didn't act like a 7th grader, after awhile, I gave up and started talking to my cousin, we acted as if each other weren't there. The date quickly turned int a casual outing with me and my cousin talking exclusively to each other and them doing the same. The only thing that irked me was that we couldn't have had conversation for each other even if there was no physical attraction, it almost seemed as if he really wanted me to know he wasn't feeling me. This guy didn't have a job, wore some dusty Fila's, had yellow teeth, wasn't attractive in the slightest, had black smokers lips, must have been 40 and is still going to the club, had naked pics of various women on his pic phone, had no intellect, is a dime bag pusher, and is socially defunct. Now tell me why I shouldn't have sat in the car the whole time refusing to participate in this bafoonery? Geez! i've got to move from this town...

A little salty this morn...

It has come. June will be the 10 year mark. Ten years since I walked across a hot, humid, and overpacked gymnasium full of onlookers and supporters to accept my High School Diploma. Our orators were full of hope and advice, by the time I left, I was convinced the world was mine. Perhaps it was, but now...hmm...I have a new perspective, a tad more realistic if you will...I didn't really think much about what I would be doing, but I definitely anticipated having a degree by now, having a husband and established in my career. I'm indecisive, why did I think that? The inability to be single minded may be perhaps my huberis. I don't know, all this is a bit overwhelming for a Tuesday morning, I should probably be working. Yeah, that's what I think i'll do because I need to reframe and perhaps i'll feel better about this whole thing.

LOVIN IT!

So i'm also trying to get tickets to the Mary J Blige/Jay Z concert... Looking forward to summer! Shouts out to Questo for the hot pics and editing techniques, besides being a drummer for one of the illest bands (no pun intended) he is a great photog too... Ain't it hot!!!

Touch the sky

As a self-professed "Photo-fiend" I have got to say this pic made me smile...Touch the sky baby!I love Kanye and frequent his blog but today I was at one of my other faves Okayplayer and gingerlynn took these photos at the JayZ Vegas show in 07'. I'm saving up to buy a digital SLR but i've not been able to get up the revenue to get the one I want. You can donate to the fund if you'd like. I'll post some of my pics soon.

Hilbama

Just a lil' Thursday Humor...But seriously, one of them needs to hurry up and reach the delegate benchmark, because I'm almost getting tired of the debates and justifications, arguing, in-fighting and random ridiculousness.

30 seconds...An eye trick

Ok so I thought this was so cool. First of all that someone could create something that appears to be a negative on a metal surface. But what's even better is that if you stare at her nose for 30 seconds and then close your eyes this picture will be inverted and you'll see the real colors.

Time

I keep fretting about being successful and doing things with my life, things that almost thirty year olds tend to do I guess. Recently i've discovered a new aging me. One that doesn't know how to do more than one current dance (wouldn't look right doing them either btw), who doesn't wear gym shoes and no longer thinks going to the club is cool, that can't drink milk with a good conscience, is discovering smile lines, not to mention i've recieved the invitation to my 10 year class reunion. Guess I should be depressed but I've changed perspectives. I'm approaching my prime I guess. If you look at the clock (pictured and explained below) i'm almost at the halfway point if I should be so lucky to make it past 60 years. I'm now thinking about retirement plans, nest eggs, a family, Legacy, contribution, heaven and hell, dying and most importantly I have recently rediscovered living. I'd like to live well. Anywho, more about the clock read below.

This is "The Life Clock" a clock mechanism slowed down 61320 times (each number represents years) would you get one? As Erykah badu sings, Time a wastin'...

Vote 08

and my last blog for the day says it all....

Now i've got to get back to work!

Vote

I Love You Katt

Ok I'm on a roll now...I just wanted to show Katt williams a lil love, not this mouch tho...

We've got to do better....

Ok so I just wanted to post my version of the Hot Mess of the Day...
Jolly ranchers tho?